For Morgan on your 1st birthday...

In all honesty, I was so happy to have made it to my due date. While the Dr. and I had discussed attempting a VBAC throughout my pregnancy with you, we agreed that if I went into labor at any time before my due date, we would give the VBAC a try; if I made my due date, I would have a scheduled C-section. Your brother had been an emergency C-section, so I knew what to expect with that. But the main reason I wanted to make that date was that Grandma and Grandpa Morris and Grandma Rache were all planning to be there. Even though Daddy’s family had been able to visit us after your brother was born, I still felt a bit lonely. Let’s face it- I wanted my Mom to be there with me. That was something I missed the first time around & I didn’t want to lose that opportunity again, even if it meant that I’d have to have another major surgery and would never be able to go back to having the opportunity to try a VBAC with any future children we might have- it was imperative to me that my Mom be there this time.

As the date grew near, we worked hard to include Liam in the preparations. As you and my belly grew, Liam became more and more interested in this mysterious being that made Mommy’s tummy move. By then he was excited to tell everyone about his baby sister Morgan that was in Mommy’s tummy. He kept asking each day when you would get to come out and play with him so he could give you kisses.

April 15th came and as nervous as I was that morning, I was starving! I had told myself that I’d be so nervous that morning I wouldn’t even want to eat- clearly I was wrong. As everyone finished breakfast with me watching hungrily on, it hit me. Not to say it was the strongest contraction in the world, but it was definitively stronger than any of the “pre-labor” induced contractions I’d had with your brother or the Braxton-Hicks contractions I’d been feeling with you for the past two months. It took my breath away. I thought to myself “Watch, I’ve made it this far & now that everyone’s going to be here & I’ve been anticipating getting to meet my baby girl by 11 am, I’m going to go into full blown labor standing right here in my kitchen & her arrival will be postponed until I deliver her by VBAC. Wonderful.” That was the one and only contraction of that magnitude I had that day.

We arrived at the hospital early & went through admission without a hitch. Turns out, there was 1 room reserved for you and I, the rest were full- seems like all the babies in the Fox Valley area decided to make their appearances that day. The Grandmas had taken Liam to the bathroom when they came to take me to the O.R. I felt guilty that I hadn’t given Liam a kiss & told him I loved him before I was taken out, but I kept telling myself that I’d see him again soon & that in a matter of moments I would get to meet our little girl. As the nurses and anesthesiologist prepared me for surgery there were a million and one things going through my mind. I was so worried that I’d missed something or that something would be wrong. But my biggest fear was wondering how I could ever give you the amount of love I’d been able to splurge solely on your brother up to that point.

They had just started the procedure when your Daddy was brought in. (I’ll let him tell you about what a wonderful experience it was to be brought in at that particular moment. Yes, there’s sarcasm there. You’ll understand this later in life.) Your Daddy was so funny that day. As he sat by my head, he was so excited I could hear his trembling in every breath he took. I told him with a giggle that he needed to calm down because I didn’t need him passing out on me. It seemed like no time at all before the Dr. told him to stand up so he could watch you come into this world. He kept telling me how beautiful you were and in short order your cord was cut and the nurse held you for a moment between the surgical table and your bassinet so I could see you (something I hadn’t been privy to when your brother was born). You weren’t cleaned up yet and your color had not fully come in, but your Daddy was right- you were beautiful! In that moment, all of the fears and worries I’d had melted away.

Daddy followed you and the nurse back to our pre-op room while the Dr. finished with me. By the time I joined you, Daddy had brought the newly promoted “big brother” in to meet you. Liam thought you were pretty cool. When one of the Grandma's joked about taking you home, Liam told them in a very stern and defensive tone, "NO! She's MY sister!"

And yes, the Grandparents were thrilled to get to hold you when you were “brand new”, less than 2 hours old.

I’ve spent most of today looking back on that day and reflecting on the year since and all the amazing milestones you’ve met so far.

In the past year you’ve managed to hit every milestone early. You held your head up early. You sat assisted at around 2.5 months old and sat alone at 4.5 months old. At around 2 months old we switched you to cloth diapers, oh the money we've saved!

You started crawling and before we knew it cruising along the furniture in January, which was about the same time you broke my nose, but that's a story for another time. It was mid-February when you took your first solo steps. We were all so excited. You would take a few steps, then stop to clap "yea" for yourself!

You've eaten and demanded more of all new foods you've tasted. You do have your favorites though. I don't think I've ever seen a baby pack it away like you do, but you always "run it off" following your big brother everywhere.

It's been amazing to watch all of the growing you've done this year. You've started to say a few select things. "Dada" and "yea" being the most pronounced, but Daddy swears he's heard you reply "I don't know" when he asks you where Mama is & today you illustrated your newest noise ensemble... you pretend burped then said "excuse me". Well, at least we know you have manners.

Today we celebrated your birthday. First, you had pancakes for breakfast.

Then you opened your presents.

You had chicken nuggets for lunch, then got some one-on-one play time with Daddy & Liam while I went to class. When I got home you "helped" me frost your cake then had macaroni & cheese for supper. We snuggled for a little bit, then sang happy birthday & you got your strawberry cake.

You had a great day.

You have truly been a blessing from God & we can't imagine life without you.
Your brother loves you so much, he could almost rival Daddy & I!
Happy birthday baby girl! We love you!